Guys, I know I often obfuscate the personal by hiding behind countless walls of inane babble, but sometimes I need to be real. This is a personal project and I’d be doing a disservice to myself if I didn’t use this space to unpack some things that I’ve been holding in. I know these kind of feelings can often be seen as icky, tacky and mushy, but if I can’t be open and honest here, what’s the point?
I’m in love.
It’s true. Sometimes you comb your feelings to find reserves of sentiment you thought yourself incapable of experiencing. Things have been difficult to deal with in this area for the last little while. I wrote at length about a particular relationship and its bearings on my capacity for personal connection. I’m happy to say that cracks of light have begun to shine through the darkness and that golden goodness we cherish above all has revealed itself once more. When something grips you with this kind of fervour, you’re only wounding yourself by denying it. When the height of your attraction meets the depth of your affection and the width of your capacity to give of yourself, the volume of your love becomes all too apparent. You don’t want to hide something this beautiful. So I won’t. I can’t. I’m here to say this where people can see it.
My snorlax kigurumi finally arrived and I love it.
It’s big and fluffy, made of warm fleece, perfect for a Canadian winter. The sleeves have elastic crimping, ensuring that they stay where I put them. It’s well stitched, everything feels solid and lovingly crafted. The buttons are large, firm and easy to use (I can’t be the only one who’s shit at buttons, right? It’s a skill I just haven’t learned). It’s super roomy. At first when I put it on I didn’t like how baggy it was. I felt like I’d been cheated on something I spent a lot of money and hope on. The more I wear it, the more it grows on me. It’s just so damn comfy and cuddly. I feel like I’m wearing a hug. It looks perfect and the girl from Etsy who made it totally nailed it. As someone who loves both pyjamas and dressing up in costumes, it’s a mash-up of my favourite things. How could I not be entirely enamoured with it?
The good news is that unlike so many relationships, this scene gets to close out with a heart-wipe. It’s in my life now and my kigurumi and I can have our happily ever after. As soon as I get home from work, reuniting with it is gonna be the first thing I do. Of course there’ll be times when I’ll need my space, when its embrace is suffocating, but I’ll be safe in the knowledge of knowing that my kigurumi will always be there when I truly need it. Love is a two-way street though, so in return I’m gonna do everything I can to take care of it. I’ll make sure it gets washed regularly and dried on the right settings. I’ll get a lint roller to make sure its coat remains ever shiny and clean.
This here is the start of a beautiful relationship.