A bumper crop.

Time is pretty strained right now, so I’m hastily updating on the run. It’s a weird thing, being immersed in so much comedy and it warps my brain. Conversations with people become bits without my knowledge, suddenly my cadence will change and I’ll feel like it’s a performance. I’ll start testing conversations in my head before I have them, workshopping the best or funniest way to say them. I become obsessed with short, snippy pieces and wonder constantly how to punch up the way I talk. I woke up this morning with a bunch (see, I’m doing it subconsciously) of banana saver jokes in my head. Coffee only simulated this proclivity and I spent more time on Facebook statuses today than I should’ve. I wish I had enough time to review what I saw last night, buy it’s just not gonna happen. Suffice to say that Chris Gethard blew me away with phenomenal storytelling, detailing his history of mental illness and lovably incompetent therapist with the perfect mix of sincerity and levity. Andy Kindler confined to prove his place as the father of alt comedy. Nikki Glaser unfortunately didn’t have much new material since her performance last year. The Ari Shaffir podcast tackled the subject of suicide in an open, honest manner. Things got dark, with small sharp pieces of comedy. It was hugely engaging to witness in person, as most podcasts are.

Anyway, I’ve run out of time, so here are some of my random Facebook updates from today:

  • I feel like a prospective date or boss could learn everything they needed to know about me with the following fact:
    I have made multiple pro/con lists on the topic of owning a banana saver.
  • People think that I’m a selfish consumer that doesn’t care about the environment. I tell them that’s not true.
    I own a banana saver.
    You just think about that for a second.
  • I think the biggest tragedy in the story of Jesus is that he didn’t survive long enough for modern product endorsements.
    Jesus saves… Bananas.
  • As a society, I think we need to grow past the preventable tragedy of battered and bruised bananas. It’s why I’m proud to own a banana saver.
    Taking action against dole-mestic abuse.
    A friend suggested perhaps I try a do-over on this one, so I proposed:
  • Bananas may look thick skinned, but inside they’re just big softies.
    That’s why I got a banana saver, because bananas are people too.
  • Sometimes I look at these flawless Instagram photos where people’s skin looks like porcelain, then I look at the trees in the background and I think to myself “why are the trees yellow?” So in your idealised version of your life, trees are yellow?
    Then I realise that color is arbitrary, beauty is subject to entropy like our decaying physical shells, life is meaningless and everything will eventually become absorbed by overwhelming futility, so in the grand scheme of things, the eerieness of yellow trees pales in importance to whatever small notion of self love you can grasp in this life.
    I may or may not be listening to The Smiths right now.
  • I’ve been going to a lot of comedy shows over the past few days and there’s this thing that always happens. The comic asks the crowd how they’re doing and they respond with a hearty “WOOOOOOO”.
    This is fine in a crowd, but if I asked someone how they were doing and they responded “WOOOOOOO” I would just think they were a ghost.

Well, enough with the comedy, time to go see some comedy. 20 shows far, only 3 days left.

 

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