I do love my german compound words. Simple complexity in neat little package. I don’t know if there’s a real term, so at the moment I’m burdened by chrömappychöly. I’m time-poor because of an overabundance of good things happening, amazing people who want to spend time around me. Would this desk were a time desk, but I can only fit so many hours into a day. A consistent run of excellent things are happening in my life. Now that the sun has come out of hiding it’s only exacerbated the issue. Hibernation no more. I’ve got events to go to that pique all manner of my interests (he says as he’s about to go tick The Protomen off his bucketlist), enough that I have to be selective about what I can actually see. I have a ton of friends who I haven’t spent quality time with in months. Lastly (and most pressing), I’m dating two women with their own scheduling needs.
Let’s speak to that firstly, because it’s the epicentre of everything else. I work a regular 9-5 Monday to Friday schedule. My girlfriend does not. Because I’m in a relationship where I legitimately enjoy my partner’s company, I find myself trying to maximise the time we can spend together when we get a clear evening. Unfortunately her work is primarily evening work. We might get two to three full evenings together a week, which is fewer than you’d expect when you’re living with a person, right? Added to the mix is this other girl who I’m seeing. Her schedule is thankfully pretty flexible and her boyfriend’s schedule is too. It’s not a biggie if her boyfriend and I cross paths (the three of us had a great dinner/hangout last night), but private time is obviously desired too. We’re trying to juggle the demands of our own relationships with time for this burgeoning one. At the moment we’re managing seeing each other about twice a week. I usually have several events each week, some of which are friend/relationship time, some of which aren’t. Then trying to slot in one on one time with friends gets tricky, or often involves cramming multiple engagements into a day. It’s getting hectic.
At the moment though, it’s all coming to a head. My girlfriend’s mum is in town, so we’re trying to spend time with her. I found out this morning that a good friend from high school (back in New Zealand) is in town with his girlfriend (who I’m similarly close to) for the next two weeks and I want to maximise time with them before they leave. I haven’t seen my family here in several months and now that my young cousin is back from university for the break, I want to hear how her life’s been going. My Favourite Ex moved into a new place at the beginning of the month and I haven’t seen her since moving day. We’re supposed to do a group IKEA trip and obviously, scheduling conflicts are getting in the way. I had to blow off a good friend’s birthday because of clashing events, so I want to take her out for a meal and spend time with her as a consolation. There are several couple hangouts my girlfriend and I have pledged ourselves to, but haven’t been able to slot in. I have at least ten other friends I’m aching to hang out with, but the time hasn’t been forthcoming. Each weekend seems a mishmash of parties that seem like an excellent opportunities for catch ups, but also mean less sleep/energy to devote to the aforementioned friends in a on one capacity. The way this is tracking I’m gonna get overloaded, implode, then have zero energy to devote to anyone else.
I believe the Germans call that Selbstentzündung.