The whole affair was pretty altaruistic on his behalf.

Guess what folks? I got Gay Married!

In a dream. I wasn’t gonna lead you on too long there. It’s always nice when you can wake up with a smile, eh? It’s better than waking up with, like, a simile. Dumb. Last night I dreamt that I needed to get American citizenship in order to get my dream job. Thing is, I had a limited window in which to apply. The result? I married my American friend (who I don’t think is American in real life). Seeing as we were doing it for cynical purposes, we resolved to throw a massive party. Also I’m not 100% certain, but this may have been my first literal dream wedding. I don’t know that I’ve ever dreamt of my wedding before, so how does my subconscious see myself walking down the aisle?

There was a lot of white and silver, big drapes coming down like streamers around the venue. An outdoor wedding, the grass was luscious, with huge columns arising on all sides. Shiny forest green and azure balloons were everywhere and there was a large screen above the altar. My groom and I were dressed in matching silver suits, prom style. Bow ties, and little accoutrements (that my wakeful mind is a big fuzzy on) to correspond with the balloon colours. He wore azure while I had the forest green. There was a four piece band, soul singer, guitar, bass and drums. I can’t remember much, other than they were funky as hell.

Instead of standing at the aisle, we both danced up with a choreographed routine, like all of those viral wedding flash mobs. Once we got to the altar, however, instead of vows we had a tournament. Embedded in the celebrant’s pedestal was an arcade console with Street Fighter Alpha 3. In order to win the right to marry each other, we both had to defeat one another’s bridal parties in 1v1 matches. It was pretty touch and go in a few matches (and I have no idea why I mained Karin),  but both of us emerged triumphant and won each other’s hand in marriage. Mid way through the tournament my dad stood up and loudly proclaimed “I can’t be bothered watching this play out. Let me know who wins, I’ll be at the bar.” most of the older people followed suit.

The dream fizzled out around that point, but I can only assume we Gay Married the fuck out of each other. Also, I remember it being a fucking great party. No idea whether I got the job or not. Would this be the bro-iest gay wedding of all time? Why didn’t I run Sakura or Akuma? Did I invite my girlfriend? How much would a silver suit cost?

Are we doing this?


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