Does Boz Scaggs order the burrito shuffle?

Our Pawdcast producer is a character. She’s 20 years old, but she’s been hanging out late night at comedy clubs since she was 12 or so. Being obviously remarkable, she caught the eye of a Just for Laughs festival organiser, who remarked on this odd occurrence and brought her on to do some reviews. She’s been doing reviews ever since, even expanding into the terrain of paid reviews. It’s amazing and showcases once again somebody younger than me who’s willing to work harder than I am. She’s become a comedy encyclopedia, which is a handy thing to have on deck when you’re hosting a comedy podcast. She’s also a prodigious musician and has a bevvy of other talents. Last night, however, I discovered the most interesting and intriguing thing about her by far.

She loves Chipotle. REALLY loves Chipotle.

Our producer loves Chipotle more than anyone else I know. Which, I guess is a given, considering nobody else I know can muster any feelings towards Chipotle beyond indifference. Chipotle, it’s a mediocre, overpriced chain. You get from Chipotle exactly what you expect to. It’s the Nandos of burritos. Outclassed by its competitors Big Fat Burrito, Fat Bastard Burrito and Burrito Boyz, all of which are barely indistinguishable from one another. There are an abundance of Mexican restaurants in Toronto, enough that if you have the time to sit down for a meal, you’d be hard pressed to make a case for Chipotle.

However, our producer loves ’em. LOVES Chipotle. Enough that she couldn’t stop spamming our Pawdcast group chat with insistence that we dropped what we were doing (y’know, like editing the next episode), left the house and went in search of a local Chipotle. Why? Because Chipotle were doing a “Boorito” promotion. I would’ve thought she was doing a bit if she didn’t seem so psychotically insistent. $3 burritos for anyone who showed up in costume post 3pm. It was imperative we went out and bought burritos. A steal, she called it. “They’re normally $8.50” she feverishly wrote. How could we ignore that density of value? Are we practically losing money by not buying them? I offered. “Yes!” She replied. That was exactly it. “I’m not going out.” My co-host chimed in. “It’s after 9! What do you think I am? Cool?” “NO TAX” she reminded us. She mentioned just how close my co-host lived to a Chipotle and provided a Google Maps link. “It’s open till 9pm. You could get one for tomorrow.” She regarded Chipotle as her forbidden love and proclaimed she’d one day marry guacamole.

Maybe I’ll get Burrito Boyz for dinner, just to rub it in.


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