I was mere minutes away from grabbing a trolley full and committing cran theft auto.

Welp, if I needed a way to adjust back to everyday life, I found it. A collection of mundane tasks to fill my day. Truth was, an adjustment was necessary. I returned home in a fugue. I’m not sure if it was fatigue. It could’ve been my irritatingly un-popped right ear. It may even have been the rush of seeing my girlfriend at the airport, getting all cuddly then parting ways at the subway so she could go perform in a recital. It was probably magnets. Whatever it was, walking in the front door was less of the warm hug I expected. The innate sense of familiarity was out of reach. Why were all the colours so saturated? Did the cat recognise me? Were these truly our things? Did I live here? The logical part of my brain said yes. The addled part of my brain that’d eaten three sandwiches over the previous 15 hours was a fence sitting sumbitch.

I felt unbalanced, but figured that if I wasn’t gonna be in any mindset to do something fun, I could at least get shit done. Slooooowly. Like a goddamn adult I unpacked my bag right away. Meds back in the drawer, dirty clothes sack emptied into my trusty hamper. Travel pack squashed back into my larger suitcase. Shower. A simple dinner of eggs and fresh veggies. Upon eating said veggies, I vegged out and finished season three of You’re the Worst.

Waking up this morning I at least knew where I was. None of this “Days Go By” shit. Porridge, time with girlfriend, gym, produce shopping, supermarket. If the most nerve wracking part of your day is trying to figure out which of the many cranberry juices in the aisle are real cranberry juice and not cranberry cocktail, comparing ingredients and brands, you’re not exactly living life at 150kph. I checked my work emails, against my better judgement. I threw a ton of filters and rules on before I left for my holiday. Most days I get around 100 emails. It’s gross and unnecessary. Checking my emails after two weeks, I had 170 or so. Success, by any metric. I abandoned all hope as I switched my workweek morning alarm back on.

Along with my five week countdown till the next vacation.


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